wow...its been over 1 month I wrote something.
Things have really changed and moved up for me.
I changed jobs,(
it was insecure ...and I need some secure income )
My new jobs salary is the pits ( minimum salary ) but the work is so rewarding, and inspiring !
I now do and paint decors,yayyyyyyyy.
As an artist, sometimes you have the '' blank page syndrome '....well with this work..I can not have this ...I have to paint...
This is good for me as it has created a sort of discipline.........once you start.....your mind follows ! :)
Some weeks I work for over 60 hours..get payed for 30...and they set aside the 30 for a week we have no decors to do...( so I will always have a pay day )
Anyways.........I am sitting tight waiting for the art grant I filled for back in November. The grant winners list will be giving out before the 15th April....
Part of the grant money ( if I get it ) will be going to an African Photo safari...for references and inspiration for future paintings.
I found one web site that offers a 10 day safari for this....the cost of.......ekkkkkkk......7 G.( for 1 person )
Crossing my fingers, but I do not think I have a chance.....well...maybe..just maybe...... :)
After struggling for money all theses pasted years........some low ( but steady ) income is welcomed.
After being a struggling artist...I guess I am happy with any sales, and compliments of my art.
I didn't set my goals too high, so I am always pleased with the results.
I also found.....that sometimes I give away small paintings.......just to see the smile on peoples faces....or to help fund animal conservation activities , gives me some sort of achievement that my talent can help in some ways.
Setting goals too high, ( personally...searching for appraisals from peers ) I have found out it just cuts your inspiration, as you dwell on the compliments of your art , and not your personal satisfaction.
Some artists I know , dwell on this...to exist in the art world.................. '
' .compliments ''If they don't get "tons '' of compliments in 1 or 2 weeks time...they feel like they lost something or they are lousing inspiration.
It's time for them to be realist and to do what they want, the style they want..for them....and not for the compliments.
Some even give up.....for theses reasons...so, they were not truly self inspired ,and this was a pass time for the research of attention and notoriety.
They even have some sort of ''art '' depression.
The point about artists with depression is really another topic. It has to do with the fact that at birth we are confronted with a true paradox .......... either conform with society (the group), or be an individual.
You cannot do both.
You must choose.
Many artist chose to be individuals, but then they feel like outsiders.........drop-outs.....or just simply different. This can lead to psychological consequences such as depression.
Friends are not the best judge for our work....they will always say its good..no matter what.
My mind is filled with projects.....maybe 1/2 will take place, but 1/2 is good right now...:)
I paint for my pleasure...from my inspiration.....all work is personal.....compliments from unknown people are a bonus !
They have an independent eye. They are the ones that buy....out of love of your work....and not just to ''encourage you ''.
oh.......a good example of this is :
Friend buys a painting..( to encourage you ) at a low $ 200.00
You build up '' faux '' confidence...and next time charge...$ 400.00
...oops..... '' friend says '' ..its good...but the price is steep for this..... **poof **....there goes your confidence...and probably your friendship with them. ( how inconsiderate they are ????? eh?????? )
This happens all the time........to all of us.
so.....don't set your goals too high.....the hill is steep downhill.
